On "Clicker" Training

I accidentally published this post last night, but I really wanted to save it as a draft.  I was just about to leave work when the post caught my eye, and I intended to explore it further when I had more time.  So, apologies for those left confused!

On to the discussin - I'd love to have any input from my readers.

Last night, I stumbled across this blog post, when I was googling some horse-related clicker training.  I've been a fan of clicker training ever since I was introduced to it working as a dog trainer (at the most intelligent of chain pet stores).  The concept of marking a behavior is nothing new to animal training, and a clicker seems to be the quickest, most consistent marker there is - if it's used right.

"Ask nicely, Mr. Pockets!"

In some of my down time with Gali, I've clicker trained him to do a few things. If you put your hand out and say "Nice to meet you!", he'll extend his hoof for you to shake.  He's learned to target frisbees for a click, and if I had time, I'd turn that targeting into 'fetch'.  When I worked with the clicker more consistantly, he'd walk up and touch my hand when I extended it and said "Come in!" in the field - Katie does this, too.  It's always fun to teach a horse tricks, and with my not-that-smart Galahad, the clicker was the easiest way to do it.

Getting rewarded for asking nicely.

I've used the clicker for behavior, too.  When Gali began to expect treats and get lippy from being hand fed, I used the clicker to teach him to ask nicely for treats.  He does this consistently now, by turning his head to the side and waiting for the treat to come to him, when he's pointed at and told to "ask nicely!".  He also knows "leave it" and "don't interrupt!" when he's searching pockets or being impatient when he's on a lead line and I'm talking to someone.

If I had more time to spend with him, I'd teach him more and I'd use the clicker to reinforce ground behavior that I want from him.

However, this blog post seems to paint clicker training as a terrible and dangerous idea.  The author that with clicker training, you're treating your horse like a bad dog - "a food motivated animal, who has no true respect for you, only an expectation of treats." and then sarcastically adds "BONUS! If you have a gelding, your “special” clicker training relationship may also include erections every time you “work” with him".

I'll refute that last point right away - I've known several geldings who were nothing but pets to their owners and got a bag of apples or carrots a day, and even though they were the most overly-treated animals I've ever known, none of them ever got hard at the crinkling of a plastic bag.  To suggest that would happen is anectdoal at best, and stupid at worst.

What the author assumes happens when you click train.

But on to the creating a "food motivated animal" with "no true respect" for its handler - I'll also disagree.  The principle of clicker training isn't treats for everything all the time - it's mark a behavior so the horse understands what it is rewarded for.  In a successfully clicker trained horse, the click itself is the reward - and that can be supplemented by treats if the owner desires.  The goal of most clicker training, though, is to reduce or eliminate the need for constant treats!

In CT, when you "load" the clicker, all you have to do is create a positive association with the click sound.  Sure, the easiest way to do this with most horses is to treat load, meaning spend a few minutes a day clicking and treating until the horse understands that the click means something good is going to happen, but you can definitely load the clicker with "good boy!", scratches, and pats.  Even with a treat loaded animal, once they understand click = good, the reward for all future sessions can be reduced to praise, and the horses will seek it out soon enough.

The clicker has definite uses in behavior training as well as trick training.  I'm planning on re-introducing the clicker to my routine with Gali to address two issues we've been having - his excessive reaction to being girthed and his spookiness in certain corners of the ring and the track.  Regarding the girthiness, he has no medical reason for complaining, he's just a grump in the barn.  I'm going to begin clicking for the moments he stops fussing while I tighten and play with his girth and saddle, and hopefully by rewarding the behavior I want and ignoring the behavior I'd like to eliminate, we'll see some progress.  That is basic behavior conditioning, after all.  The clicker is just a tool to expedite the process.

For his spookiness, I have two plans.  I'm going to use the clicker to reinforce his one-installed head down command, to use on moments where he tenses up and tries to flee from a situation he sees as scary.  I am just trying to narrow down what cue I'd like to use - probably a light whip tap on his shoulder, because that's distinctly something I'd use for "head down" and nothing else.  I'm also going to use the click to encourage him exploring scary things - a nose touch of a scary lawn chair or steps towards the Tree Shed will get a click and praise.

He'll never excel in any athletic discipline.  Obviously.

The blog post claims that "a clicker trained horse is not going to excel in any athletic discipline."  I'm going to have to completely disagree here - even if I was just using the clicker to teach Gali circus tricks, I don't see any correlation between being able to fetch and not being able to leg yield.

Another point made by the author: "a clicker trained horse is not going to be a truly safe horse; the clicker trained horse is conditioned to do tricks for treats" - again, I could not disagree more.  An unsafe horse is one that does not understand what it is allowed to do.  Clicker training - treat based or not - can be used to create a safe horse.  Take my example on bomproofing (okay, okay, maybe more like poprocks proofing) Gali.  If you really think there is any other way to de-spook my Percheron-bodied Thoroughbred-brained 16 year old  besides exposing him to scary things and rewarding him for not freaking out about them, I'd really like to hear it.  Again, the clicker just facilitates the training process.


"With clicker training, you would wind up with a horse who will not only take your hand off, but who will also become severely aggressive with absolutely no respect for people. Because with clicker training, horses never, ever receive negative reinforcement (only “positive”, treat based reinforcement – the basis of clicker training), the “win-win relationship” coined by many clicker “trainers” would turn this once inquisitive horse into 1200 pounds of disrespect."

He's so disrespectful, he's actually trying to trample me.

This article finishes off as it started - reading like a poorly cited high school research paper written in the Study Hall before its deadline.  Every single horse who is clicker trained is going to become a disrespectful monster?  Gali is proof that that is not the case - his "ask nicely" command has actually significantly reduced his lippy, treat-demaning behavior that he acquired years ago, as a result of being overtreated.

And, it may be nitpicking here, but the author has her psychology mixed up.  Negative reinforcement, well, strengths a behavior.  Horse paws for attention, owner smacks horse, horse thinks "Oh!  Attention! Pawing works!".  I believe the term the author was looking for was "negative punishment", which sounds oh so scary and pretty much like you're beating your subject, but in reality, "negative punishment" is what is suggested in clicker training.  By only clicking for desired behaviors and ignoring - a form of punishment - the negative behavior, the negative behavior will be weakened or eliminated.  Psychology 101 - I apologize for the soapbox there.

So - that's my piece.  I believe in clicker training not just horses, but dogs, too - and not just to form a lovey-dovey relationship, like the blog post author assumes.  I like clicker training because it makes the training I'd be doing anyway quicker and easier.

What do you guys think?

Lazy Days

(Before I write about today's ride, I'd like to point all of my readers over to Over Fences and Under Trees, where my friend Lynn has started blogging about her progress with her lovely quarter horse, Max.)

Max says "Nope."

When Lynn and I made plans to meet at the barn at 10:30 this morning, I knew I'd be tired and grumpy and not wanting to roll out of bed and leave Rutgers by 9:30, but that I'd be able to do it.  I wasn't expecting to get a call at 3:45 AM from a very drunk Bekka, who had to explain to me in absolute amazement that she found a door with a lock on the outside.  After that call, I wasn't able to get back to sleep until about 5 AM, so when my alarm went off at 9, I grumbled and snoozed and seriously considered cancelling my barn plans.

However, my bad-pony-mom guilt got the best of me, and I bundled up and made the drive down I-95 and 206.  By the time I got to the barn, the sun had claimed a good portion of the sky and I was able to shed some layers and enjoy the nice weather.  I wasn't the only one enjoying the sun's rays - as I was pulling in to the barn, Lynn called me half laughing and half worried, because she couldn't get a lazy Max to stand up after she caught him sunbathing.  She managed to get him up and he begrudgingly followed her into the barn while I walked out to get Gali....

who had decided, along with his pasturemate Tig, that today was certainly a day good for sunbathing and not much else.   Luckily, I didn't have to battle to get Gali up, and soon we joined our friends tacking up in the barn.  Lynn and I have similar goals and similar problems - both of us have had our confidence shaken by past riding experiences, and both of us are looking for something to work towards this year, even if we aren't 100% sure what that is yet.  We've made a plan to motivate each other and help push ourselves past our comfort zones, and today was the first day acting on that plan.

We were successful, sort of!  Our original plan was to go around the track, but after warming up in the ring, I semi-bailed on that.  Gali was a mixture of sore (I believe the sledding took more out of him than he wanted to admit!) and spirited, which led to some refusal to go forward and some spookiness.  I got him working well enough in the ring at the trot, but I didn't really make him work all that hard.  Max was being very lazy for Lynn, but after she got after him and practiced using the crop without letting go of the reins, he began to pick up his feet and move out.

While we were in the ring, I walked Gali over some crossrails and ground poles so that Lynn and Max would follow, and Gali seemed to have fun walking over the jumps.  That's some sort of cross training, right?  I was tempted to let him hop over one or two, since they were just set at about 18", but I refrained.  I do wish he was able to jump, because he loves it, and I'd love to be able to take him out XC schooling and hop him over small things.  It's a shame his ringbone really stops us from exploring that type of cross training.

After the ring work, we walked halfway around the track and back.  It wasn't much, but considering Gali was looking at everything like it was going to eat him, and at the same time making ugly faces when Max would get too close, it was something.  Max, on the other hand, was absolutely perfect outside of the ring, and while Gali was next to him eying up the dangling wind chimes, he was looking around without a care in the world.

It wasn't the spectacular ground-breaking day that I envisioned it would be, but sometimes we just all need lazy days relaxing in the sun.  Next week, a friend of ours from Nouveau is moving her 27 year old OTTB over to the farm, and I know she's going to really help kick me into shape, and her gelding is the absolute best trail buddy anyone could ask for.  I'm looking forward to that, and the adventures that will certainly follow!

On Supplements

I have been getting Gali's supplements for the entire time I've had him from a company that pre-packages and ships out supplements.  They focus on a lot of natural supplements, and were a very good alternative to SmartPaks.  For a few reasons, I am moving away from using that company and am now trying to decide if I am going to change up Gali's supplements (to SmartPaks) or keep them as they are and dole them out in scoops.  I'd like to hear your opinions on herbal supplements, joint care measures, etc.  Another option that I have would be to move away from oral joint supplements altogether and give I.M. Glucosamine... not my favorite solution, as Gali is a PITA for shots, but any (anecdotal or clinical) word on the effectiveness of I.M. vs oral?

Aside from the convenience of SmartPaks vs. Buckets, if I switched, I would be moving away from the strongly herbal supplements that he's been on.  If I do decide to switch it up, I'd just as quickly switch him back if I saw any difference in him that I did not like.

What he's on now:

Animed Remission - Magnesium and Chromium supplement designed to help with his cresty pony syndrome and prevent founder from metabolic issues.  I like this supplement because it's cheap and it's a peace-of-mind thing.

Aniflex Complete: 5000 mg Glucosamine, 2075 mg Chondroitin, 3525 mg Vitamin C, 1765 mg MSM, 800 mg Yucca, 50m HA.

Arthritis-Laminitis Formula: This is the herbal, twiggy stuff that I believe helps with his lameness a great deal.  From the manufacturer's website:

• Multiple medicinal action of these herbs help in relief of pain and inflammation associated with chronic joint problems, sore muscles, and navicular problems. Combined with circulatory and system cleansing herbs, offers use for Laminitis support.
  
  Meadowsweet-contains salicylic acid and is know as herbal aspirin.
  
  White Willow bark powder -Used for arthritis,chronic joint pain,sore muscles,anti-inflammatory actions.
  
  German Chamomile Whole FLower Tops -Digestive aid, reduces gastrointestinal spasms,especially helpful in horses that are having recurrent digestive problems. Calming effects, anti-inflammatory actions.
  
  Gotu Kola-(no caffeine)-used for circulation.
  
  Ginger-Warming herb promotes digestive enzyme activity.Stimulates circulation. Studies showing use for arthritis,anti-inflammatory agent.
  
  Echinacea-Boosts immune system, fights bacterial and viral infections. Builds resistance to infections in the respiratory tract and aids in drainage of the respiratory tract. Some research showing anti-inflammatory actions. Helps urinary track. Contains flavonoids, especially rutin, which strengthens blood vessels and helps circulatory problems.
  
   Rosehips- High nutritional value, bioflavonoids,helps connective tissue.

MSM - Well, it's MSM. 10,000 mg in addition to the 1765 mg in the AniFlex.

What I'm considering: 

SmartFlex III - 10,000 mg Glucosamine 1,000 mg of Chondroitin Sulfate, 100 mg of Hyaluronic Acid, 10,000 mg of MSM, 5,000 mg of Vitamin C, 500 mg of bioavailable Silica, 1,000 mg of Hydrolyzed Collagen and 400 mg of Grape Seed Extract.

SmartTLC -  5,000 mg of MSM, 100 mg of Cetylated Fatty Acids, 3,000 mg of Yucca and 2,500 mg of Devil’s Claw, in addition to Boswellia, Hydrolyzed Collagen, Grape Seed Extract and Omega 3 Fatty Acids.  For his senior-ness.  I know he isn't 'old' yet, but I like the herbal ingredients here, and the additional MSM.

Remission - Probiotics 175 million CFU, Magnesium 6000mg, Methionine 3000mg, Lysine 2150mg, Vitamin C 1200mg, Zinc 100mg, Vitamin E 70IU, Niacin 40mg, Biotin 20mg, Selenium 1ppm, Omega 3 Fatty Acids 1.8%

I would also put him on Cool Calories 100 just for the next few months, so I could (hopefully) be able to cut his grain down to a lesser amount than he's getting now, which is just a bit more than I'm comfortable with.

So, everyone who likes talking lameness, joint care, nutrition and supplements, let me hear you!

Horse Sledding 2012

The snow that fell on Saturday was the area's first real accumulation of the year.  When I woke up on Sunday and it was still on the ground, I invited Dom, Lynn, and Lynn's boyfriend Anthony, out to play snow ponies.

Ghetto rig last year.

Last year, our attempts were not quite graceful, and our ghetto rigged sled needed a running start before we could get pulled, but the icier snow and better rigging this year led to a lot more success.

After a short mad scramble for a sled, I found the perfect one and headed out to the barn to meet up with everyone.  My original plan was to borrow a western saddle and throw the tow rope over the horn, but Gali loudly objected to a western saddle, and we decided to tack him up in his usual saddle and attached the breastplate that I may or may not have purchased for exactly these situations.

Lynn's horse, Max, was relieved when he saw this was not for him!

Now, I've been having a lot of problems with Gali lately - even my trimmer noticed his nervousness and antsy personality change - so I wasn't really sure what to expect.  I took complete advantage of Dom being out there and threw her up on Gali first, and she took him around the track to explore the footing and farm.

When they came back in one piece, we hooked up a lunge line to the breastplate, hopped in the sled, and hung on.

Gali could not have been better for everything.  He gladly cantered back and forth along the long side of the track with a very loud sled (and very loud riders!) chasing him, and Herbie running alongside.  He was exceedingly happy and I think he may have had more fun than we did!  It was great to see him in a good mood and behaving as I know he can, but it did make me think that he's asking for a change in discipline... I love dressage, and he usually loves dressage, but maybe we can mix it up a lot more in the future.  It's a shame he hated the western saddle, because I think he'd have a blast cutting cattle, running barrels, or in trail classes.

Anyway, on to the pictures (yanked from Dom and Anthony) and videos (taken by Dom while Gali and I pulled).

Mr. Wonderful

I don't care how many times he takes off on me, or how low our dressage scores get, I wouldn't trade my horse for the world.  Gali is, without a doubt, the best shenanigans horse that's ever lived.

More later, when I thaw out.

Regression

I can't help but feel as if Gali and I are in a rut, and a downward slide.  When I first moved him to BTF, he was on his third month of lameness from ringbone, and I was absolutely dying to get back in the saddle.  Once he regained his soundness (thanks to a great team of horsepeople and 24/7 turnout), I felt like a completely different rider.  When I was at Nouveau, I was afraid to ride him outside much.  He knew this, and he'd mess with me by getting strong, bolting, and ignoring my aids.  Right before he went lame, I had begun to really work on this, but I left Nouveau for a slew of reasons and haven't looked back.

Me, usually.

Me, over the summer.  Who is this?  

Anyway, back to what I was saying.  Once he was sound again, I didn't let my fears control me.  I hopped on and rode him outside - we have no indoor, so I had no choice - and slowly built up my confidence.  I took him around the track alone and in company at all three gaits and even a little bit of gallop - an incredible step up for my Chuckie Finster self.  Gali seemed to take up a similar disposition - he was no longer Mr. Spookvember, and not feeling the need to take off every time he didn't want to work.  We had a lot of good times around the track, in the jump field, and in the side ring of the arena.  I felt that we were ready for 'real-people' things like shows, hunter paces, and clinics.  I really began to believe in us as a pair.

And suddenly, that's all gone.  I'm not sure if it was his awful behavior outside before the Lendon clinic (although he was lovely inside), or the fact that he's been super spooky lately, or if I'm just shaken up because I haven't been riding regularly, but I'm falling back into that fear zone.  I hope it's temporary and I hope it will go away the more I force myself to get on and get out.  I have to remember how good he is on trails with everyone else (and even me, despite photo evidence suggesting otherwise), and that if he does take off, he'll have to stop eventually.

Back to being terrified, but at least I can joke about it!

I also have to stop making excuses.  His teeth were fine, despite being overdue.  My vet doesn't think there are any mineral imbalances because Gali's on a full ration of grain, but he suggested magnesium if I am really worried.  I don't think it's that, really.  His sheath wouldn't case him to spook at leaves and peacocks.  He's just got a lot of pent-up energy, and I need to get back to directing that energy like I did when he came back after a three month layoff.

He's always going to be a challenging horse, and unless I learn to control my anxiety, he's always going to get the best of me.  I just wish all of those "I should"s and "I need to"s were as easy to do as they are to write.

Liebster Blog Award

Liebster means “dearest” in German, and the award is intended to help up-and-coming blogs get the attention they deserve. Here are the rules:

1. Copy and paste the award on this blog.
2. Link back to the blogger who gave us the award
3. Pick your five favorite blogs with less than 200 followers, and leave a comment on their blog to let them know they have received the award.
4. Hope that the five blogs chosen will keep spreading the love and pass it on to five more blogs


I got the award from Dom over at A Collection of Madcap Escapades. Thanks for the award and the promotion!  Always love new followers - more brains to pick when Gali and I hit speedbumps :D

I just moved over to Blogspot and don't yet follow many blogs, so here are my favorites on both Blogspot and tumblr.
 
So Fly [Tumblr] - My friend Alexis chronicles every single ride she's had since she bought her horse Adam... reading it always gives me ideas for what to do with Gali, and prompts a lot of other horse-world discussion.  You can also find her real-life (and also mostly horse related) blog here.

Now THAT'S A Trot! [Blogspot] - Erin and her two super standardbreds are a lot of fun to read about, and we have similar "get out to a horse show and don't die" goals this season.  She's a great writer and posts lots of lovely pictures of her blogged about adventures.

FuckYeahCartography  - As a geography major, there's nothing that makes me any happier than maps.  Maps maps map.

The Adventures of Lucy [Blogspot] - I first found Kate's blog through mutual livejournal friends, and have enjoyed reading about her progress with her gorgeous OTTB, Lucy.  Another blog with great pictures and lots of video!

Many Splendored Rat  [Tumblr] - I don't know how many followers Lisa has, but I also don't care, because she deserves every single one of them.  She's one of my oldest online friends - we started talking about racehorses when we were 11 and 12 - and regularly blogs about her nine rats: Simon, Badger Potter, Ears, Oliver, Bentley, Carter, Darcy, Edgar and Jameson.  You get great pictures and occasionally a gem - for example, every post tagged  #awkwardencounterswithmyneighbor.


And one that has a lot of followers, but I still want to promote:


Make Something Marvelous [Tumblr] - the best DIY/Crafts blog I've come across.

"But mom, I'm retired!"

I drove down to visit my sister in Chesapeake Beach, Maryland late Friday night and got back early Sunday morning, only to have to run to my baby cousin's christening within ten minutes of getting home.  Needless to say, Gali had the weekend off and I did not get any sleep, so his day off rolled into today.

I was supposed to go hang out at the horse park with Erin and Dom, but when my phone alarm went off this morning and I couldn't think straight, I decided to bail out on the hour long drive and agreed to catch up with them next time they go.  I got to sleep in for another few hours, and then headed out to see my pony.

Gali got his teeth done today, and was a very good boy for the entire process.  The dentist didn't find anything sharp on his teeth and said he didn't seem bad at all, which was a surprise to me because he was a few months overdue.

After his teeth were done, I gave him a scratch, turned him out, and drove home to take a nap.  I'm heading back up to Rutgers tonight - break is officially over.  I don't think I got nearly as much done this break as I wanted to, or as I would have if I had an indoor, but I'm not going to lose sleep over it.  Just gotta keep trying.

No Bueno - or Winter Spazzies?

Awful 'ride' today.  Gali was incredibly spooky - and not in his usual "I'd rather not!" way, but this new extremely tense "GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!" way that he rarely pulls, and that he's pulled twice in the past three rides.  I know I haven't been riding a lot lately and that could be where the excess energy is coming from, but I'm not convinced it's just energy, because he's being specifically spooky and not just bolting or spinning to be bad.

He's overdue for a teeth float, so I have our dentist coming out early Monday morning to work on him.  I'm also cleaning his sheath tomorrow or Friday because, who knows, maybe that's bugging him  (It's been a while...).

I'm also toying with the idea (and by toying I mean, I'm 90% sure I'm going to have it done) of getting Ted to run blood work on Gali to check for any deficiencies other than his normal mental one.  He gets well over the minimum amount of grain for his weight according to the bag, so he should be fine, but with the usual 24/7 grass being dialed back to lots of bulk purchased hay, it wouldn't completely surprise me.

Or... it could be that he's just being a shit, and if that's the case, I'll have to invest in some Sadl-Tite and put the running attachment back on his breastplate so his ears stop getting so damn close to my nose.

Pony Rides: Photo Post

Yesterday was way too nice to be spent actually being productive, so we decided to just goof around instead.

 This is about the most I asked Gali to do all day... and also, did I ever tell you guys how much I love this farm?

More photos behind the cut.

Some good rides, and a shitty start to the New Year

I've been taking advantage of the incredible weather over the last three days and got out to 'ride' each day.  On the 30th, I planned on going out for a trail ride with Bekka, but Jason had another medical setback that (thankfully) only wasted half of our day.  I would've loved to just stay home and watch movies, but Gali needed grain and I knew that trying to get to an Agway on New Years' Eve or New Years' Day wouldn't be an easy chore.  After calling the Agway that is five minutes from my house to learn that they did not have any of his feed left, I called three other feed and grain stores in the area to learn that Legends Performance Pellet was worth gold this week.  I ended up having to go all the way up to Columbus to pick up six bags, and by the time I got to the farm, I was losing daylight fast.

Bekka was out there with a few friends who really wanted to ride Gali, so I tacked him up and warmed him up before handing the lunge line over to Bekka and letting the kids have fun on the Big Comfy Couch.  For my warm up he was fantastic, and he was responding so well to what I was asking him to do that I decided to back off of the dressage work and just give him some strength work.  I got up into two point and both of us worked on keeping our balance without reins at the canter.  I've always loved this exercise, because it really helps both of us loosen up mentally, helps him stretch down without leaning on me, and is a great core/balancing exercise for myself.  We did a few laps around the ring in both directions before I handed him off.  I heard later that he was amazing for both of the riders - one who can clearly handle herself on a crazy horse, and another who just likes to plod around on quarter horses all day - and I was proud of his newfound levelheadedness.

Yesterday, I went out to the farm alone, desperately needing some time away from all of the stress I've been not dealing with since Thanksgiving.  When I found myself crying and singing "Hang" by Matchbox 20 at the top of my lungs, I knew that all I really needed was a good canter around the track to get it all out.

I got on and Gali reminded me why I loved him - he was on the bit from the start, stretching when I asked him to, floating in his leg yields, going deep into the usually scary corners, giving me some amazing walk to canter transitions, and not paying any attention to anyone else but me.  We warmed up at all three gaits and a bit of hand gallop in each direction, and I only wanted another 15 minutes of work out of him before I planned on either walking to the lake or cantering around the track, but I got stupid.  The barn owner and one of her students warned me that they were going to bring down a tree that had fallen on a shed next to the ring.  For half a second I thought "Maybe I should just go out to the track", but my stupid side took over and said "Oh, cool!  What a good thing to show Gali so he won't be afraid of construction!"  I got off and walked him over to watch, and for the most part, he kept his cool.  He was very upset when the tree branches came down one by one, but other than running around me to hide, he really behaved.  I took him to the jump ring and hopped on, giving up on the goal of the track because he was on high alert, because I wanted to finish the working part of our ride.  He was really wound up  from the experience of watching things! happen, so I let him finish on some stretchy trot in both directions before walking him over to the barn.  One of our biggest problems at the Lendon clinic was his refusal to stand still, so we spent 15 minutes standing in a relaxed halt by the barn, backing up down the bank of the track (more strength work for him) and halting by the gate to his field.  I was happy with him, despite our change in plans.

Today... sucked.  I went out alone, and Gali seemed to be in a really good mood while I groomed and tacked up.  I took him to the ring and perched the gate in such a way that we could swing it open without dismounting, because I wanted to get out on the track after a warmup.  It might have been the wind, it might have been tree anxiety, or it might have just been a combined lack of brain, but we really just didn't click today.  We went through the motions, but ten minutes into the warmup I decided "F this, nothing will stop us from getting on the track today!".  Ahem.

I dropped my reins to the buckle and aimed Gali for the gate for our freedom.  The gate swung open with a gust of wind, and all of a sudden my horse spun and bolted away from that corner of the ring.  I lost my stirrup and somehow grabbed the reins, with the whip magically turned around in my hand and waving past his eye and he flew towards the other side of the ring.  I was halfway off of him from the spin, and the saddle slipped bad, and I was looking at the ground bracing myself for impact when I thought "I am NOT falling off!" and shimmied my way back onto him.  I had no saddle under myself, and therefore no real leverage to get him back with an e-brake, so I just had to hope that my voice would be enough to slow him until I could actually grip my reins and bring him back.  To his credit, once I got my head on straight and began to talk him down, he snapped back into it and I was able to get him to halt sooner than I expected.  I hopped off to fix the saddle, and okay, because he was still shaking, still on alert, and I was shaking.

This is where I made a mistake... I didn't get back on.  I chickened out, I guess.  I grabbed a lunge line and lunged him by the scary door, and then played a de-spooking game where we touched tarps and lawnchairs and walked around to the usually iffy back of the barn... I thought he was okay, until we turned the corner and I realized he wasn't spooking at the tree shed, or the lawnchairs or the tarp - but a big aluminum shed with a wooden dairy door that was unhooked, and swinging into the tin with every breeze.   By the time we were there, every nerve in my brain (and in Gali's) was saying "Let's just turn around and go back the other way!, but I got his focus back and walked him past it.

It really wasn't any sort of victory for me at all though.  I feel defeated.  How am I ever going to get him to shows when a bolt nearly unseats me, and even if it doesn't, I unseat myself?